I am not a good listener

Today My confession is that I  am not a good listener. 

which  make me weak in carrying out a conversation. 

Here in Thailand, I find it very difficult to carry a conversation with anyone. 

Here I  was  thinking, that might be because of the language barrier. People are weak in English and it's hard to talk, but at this point,  I come to realized that, it's not the case.

I was listening  to a ted talk by  Celeste Headlee.  (She has worked in public radio since 1999) She was talking about How to have a good conversation . She pointed out 10 things. They are:

1- Be present  - I always do something else, when I listen to someone. I know I can multi-task if  I Had to listen without doing anything. That is like killing myself. 

2- Don't be a negative person ( I forgot the exact word)

3- Use open-ended questions.

4- Go with the flow. 

5- If you don't know say you don't know 

6- Don't equate your experience with them  it's not the same ( I always do this)

7- Don't repeat what you say ( I always do this )

8- Forget about the details when you talk ( name, years , etc ) (I try to remember them and I end up saying nothing cause I don't remember them.)

9- Listen  - carefully listening , don't make you mind go wondering around. ( I am lack of this ability)

10- Be brief. 

My listening power is my everything, I would rather listen to book review to avoid reading. but I am not a good listener for  people stories and conversation. 

Here after I will  improve my listening skill to improve conversation. I think I am gonna love it. :)

About love

All the stories talk about a guy seen a girl and fall in love. He tries so hard to get that love. He meant to keep it for whole his life. But I wonder why they can not? , why they break up? why they break up each others heart ?.

Different stories end in different ways. It's either the girl fault or the man fault. Either, way it ends. where is the happy part in fall in love , when we cannot keep it.

It wasn't the thing in my mind actually . What am I thinking is it the man responsibility to find love? , or what should we say give love or show the love to the girl.  After finding it keeping it is also for the man job.

A girl can love  so many times. when life goes on she forgets about the true love or fake love or about just love. After some time, she looks for the caring one who will actually do anything to keep her.

So what happen to that first love or the boy who saw her first and taught  her about love. What happened between them. Is it the girl fault or the boys? Is it the fault of both of them?

They say true love  or what we called perfect love ends because they stop fighting for love and they start fighting for life forgetting love.

Even they say if the boy treats the girl the way he treated her first days of their relationship, their love gonna last forever.

First thing is , we fall love and we want to keep it forever. right!
We know all these techniques also , like treat the girl the way you treated at first , and fight for love and goes on.
but why we neglect those?   why we forget that?  Make our own life miserable by our self?